J
I was on my third glass of whiskey when the stray cat I let in out of the rain began giving birth to kittens on my couch.
2011-11-11 15:10:16 / Rating: 362.5 / 
Story archives - tag: "drinking"
No Getting Over
In almost three years of not seeing her, I've swallowed oceans of booze, smoked cartons of cigarettes, slept with a dozen different women, been arrested twice, found God, fired God, and nearly died at the hands of five angry men; and I still can't get over her.
2010-05-03 16:29:12 / Rating: 927.75 /
Haven't learned yet
The men in my life can be explained as one alcoholic stepping stone to another.
2009-08-03 15:58:30 / Rating: 248 /
Kendra
When I went downstairs to use the internet I found my father passed out drunk in front of the computer, so I blogged over top of him.
2009-06-14 17:37:38 / Rating: 346.5 /
Stace
Becoming a stay-at-home mother has made me believe there is absolutely nothing wrong with drinking before noon.
2009-05-28 17:38:31 / Rating: 594.75 /
MC
The frequency of my public nudity decreased dramatically when I stopped drinking to excess.
2009-04-30 09:38:01 / Rating: 251.5 /
Chelsea
As I collapsed on the bathroom floor about to pass out, I realized that taking a really hot shower after drinking too much vodka is not a good idea.
2009-02-09 12:50:28 / Rating: 301.75 /
Tom
The four of us were in the bar drinking for at least thirty minutes before we realized it was a gay bar.
2009-01-21 14:28:40 / Rating: 368.5 /
Matt
As I stood shivering and topless outside 7-11 at 3 in the morning with a strange woman who was just let out of jail, I wondered whether it was a sign to stop drinking or a suggestion to drink more.
2008-10-13 15:17:17 / Rating: 653.25 /
anon
Every time I have to ask what I did last night I feel like Sherlock Holmes.
2008-09-08 10:55:06 / Rating: 355.75 /
RA
I opened my dorm room door to a frantic guy who said, "There's a naked body on 4th floor and I'm not even kidding."
2008-08-11 15:54:31 / Rating: 436.75 /
Peanut
The cop and I had a delightful conversation about sweaters and the weather and to this day he does not know that I was drunk and not even 17 yet.
2008-06-25 16:05:41 / Rating: 427.5 /
madprofessor
If there was ever a good time to stop drinking, it was this morning when I woke up next to a woman in a giraffe costume.
2008-06-17 13:22:51 / Rating: 784.75 /
Cinnamon Stillwater
I don't know if it was the alcohol, the darkness or the rush to put my clothing back on that made me fall onto the cactus.
2008-04-10 14:56:44 / Rating: 616.5 /
Nelly
Yesterday I had to explain to my roommates, who don't drink, why Jeff's car was in the backyard.
2008-02-29 16:36:23 / Rating: 428.25 /
jfirth
Thirty seconds before vomiting, the room spinning, vision cloudy, I recited the alphabet backwards and thought, "Well, I'm not drunk yet."
2008-02-20 16:25:47 / Rating: 522.25 /
Dormouse
Puking up that champagne was really my head ridding my life of 2007.
2008-01-01 11:53:39 / Rating: 436.25 /
card player
I hate to play cards when I'm drunk, because I always lose.
2007-08-07 16:18:21 / Rating: 291.75 /
Catherine
The next week, I "forgot" to shower and ate enough to make me ill, hoping he would stop finding me attractive.
2007-07-24 16:44:36 / Rating: 410.75 /
Danimal
My teetotaling harks back to the ripe age of 13 when, in a fit of uncontrollable giggling, I was ordered to a guest bedroom so they could continue the Passover seder.
2007-07-11 13:02:00 / Rating: 416.5 /
Sarah
As I fell through the ice on Lake Michigan staring at the morning sun, I realized my night of revelry had made me feel invincible (and I wasn't).
2007-06-21 09:58:21 / Rating: 372.75 /
Element
After three nights of passing out drunk and bleeding, I decided it might be time to talk to someone.
2007-01-30 16:47:50 / Rating: 371 /
DeepEndZen
It's not the hangovers I fear the most, but the fact that I've lost a few hours of my life that I can never get back.
2006-10-23 09:35:17 / Rating: 460 /
revscrj
Two blocks of silence to the store we bought another EPT and a bottle of Rumplemintz, the big bottle.
2006-10-16 14:51:31 / Rating: 418.5 /
kimiko
I didn't feel as humiliated when he told me that at least six other people puked their guts out at the last house party, but I still made sure to stay sober this time.
2006-10-10 09:24:53 / Rating: 354.25 /
Castalia
We went out to drink, he got drunk and got caught by a teacher.
2006-09-30 11:40:36 / Rating: 339.5 /
Gilgongo!
I looked up from the floor, towards the bartender, and then, for no apparent reason - I drank fourteen vodka martinis.
2006-09-28 15:56:02 / Rating: 283.75 /
Brad
It was a mistake to leave Matt in the car to sober up, because it turns out he was in there puking a varitable mix of pure liquid alcohol and huge chunks of roast beef that made me ponder my chewing habits.
2006-08-10 14:00:28 / Rating: 410.75 /