Story archives - tag: "toys"

Steampunk Wench

It's nice to know that no matter where I go and how long I'm gone for, my mother will always arrange my dolls in random sexual positions as a 'welcome home' surprise.

tags: home welcome funny toys [add]

2009-12-30 09:06:29 / Rating: 898.5 /


For Christmas, my two year old son received two toy monster trucks which he promptly named Comfort and Joy.

tags: toys names Christmas toddler [add]

2009-02-09 14:15:57 / Rating: 693.5 /

Loving Mother

Unconditional love is when you take the batteries from your vibrator to power your child's favorite car.

tags: batteries toys motherhood [add]

2008-07-01 15:11:11 / Rating: 1151.5 /


Imagine my two girls as they opened up their exciting Christmas toy, squeezed goop into molds, put the mold into the oven, then waited, and waited, and waited, realizing that there was no heat, no light bulb, and would be no bug - just a bunch of disappointing goo.

tags: childhood toys Christmas humor [add]

2008-01-25 13:21:04 / Rating: 613.25 /